Gift Your Spouse a Marriage Retreat
Marriage Retreats Romantic Adventures Refresh & Renew Retreats Marriage Intensives Marriage Resources

Young couple using free date night conversation starters to have good conversation on a coffee date

200 Free Printable Conversation Starters for Couples

November 1, 2023

200 Creative Questions To Ask Your Spouse When You Have “Nothing to Talk About” 

When your relationship was new, we bet you had no problem talking with your significant other. However, you may have found that over time your conversations have started to drag, and you don’t know what else to talk about. You’ve covered the basics like, “Do you like your meal?” and “How has work been?” But when is the last time you and your spouse have dreamed together about your perfect vacation or asked a silly question like, “If you had to live in another time period, which would you choose?” 

Don’t be too hard on yourself if you need help thinking up new conversation starters for your next date. We’re here to help. Below, we’ve listed 200 different questions for couples like you to ask each other whether you’re enjoying breakfast in bed, a picnic in the park, or a romantic dinner. 

We know there will be some answers to questions that you’ve talked about before, so use this time to think back on fond memories or retell a favorite story. Have some of your answers changed? If so, don’t be afraid to lean into why you answered the question differently in the past.

So, if you and your spouse have been married for quite some time, or even if you’re dating, engaged, or newly married, use these free resources as guides. Print out the PDFs of questions, and keep them handy or download them to your phone to reference. Either way, you’ve got the easy part—having creative conversation with your spouse. The pressure’s off, and the fun is on! Don’t worry if you don’t answer every question during your date. Let the date night conversation starters lead you, and save what you don’t get to for next time.

General Date Night Conversation Starters

Travel Themed Date Night Conversation Starters

Family Themed Date Night Conversation Starters

Fall Themed Date Night Conversation Starters

General Date Night Conversation Starters V2

Date Night Conversation Starters That Will Make You Reminisce

Deep Date Night Conversation Starters

Thanksgiving Themed This or That Conversation Starters

Christmas Themed This or That Conversation Starters

Gratitude Date Night Conversation Starters

20 General Date Night Conversation Starters

Whether you’re newly married or you’ve been married for decades, these general conversation starters are perfect to talk through. They range in topic and seriousness, so get ready to run the gamut during your date.

  1. If you could have any job, whether serious or silly, and money was not a factor, what would it be?
  2. If you could have one superpower, what would it be?
  3. What are the top five things you would ask for if you were stranded on a desert island?
  4. What is your most irrational fear?
  5. Who are three famous people, dead or alive, you would want to have lunch with?
  6. If you could make a guest appearance on any TV show, what would it be?
  7. What is your favorite movie genre?
  8. What is the first thing you would buy if you won the lottery?
  9. What does your perfect Saturday look like?
  10. If we bought a boat, what would we name it?
  11. What is your favorite book genre?
  12. If you had to live in another time period, which would you choose?
  13. What is your most rational fear?
  14. What is one outfit you love that I wear?
  15. What is one habit you wish you could break?
  16. What is your least favorite household chore?
  17. What is one of your biggest pet peeves?
  18. How well do you think you would respond in a time of crisis?
  19. If you could have one hidden talent, what would it be?
  20. What is your favorite music genre?

20 Travel Themed Date Night Conversation Starters

Just in time for your summer vacations, download these creative questions to ask your spouse solely related to traveling. Talk about your dream destinations to visit, and discuss your highly important opinions on road trip essentials.

  1. If you had an unlimited budget, where is the first place you would travel?
  2. What is one vacation we have gone on that you would love to do again?
  3. What is your favorite and least favorite part about traveling?
  4. What does your perfect vacation look like?
  5. Besides your phone, wallet, and passport, if you could only pack five items in your carry-on bag, what would they be?
  6. Do you prefer the window, middle, or aisle seat on an airplane?
  7. Do you prefer flying in the morning, afternoon, or night?
  8. What top five items are essential on a road trip?
  9. On a road trip, are you listening to music, a podcast, or an audio book?
  10. On a plane, are you sleeping, watching a movie, or reading a book?
  11. What are three places you love visiting?
  12. Do you think there is a difference between a vacation and an adventure?
  13. Where is one place you have been that you would not want to go back to?
  14. Do you prefer to vacation somewhere hot or cold?
  15. What is one of your favorite memories from a vacation you took as a child?
  16. What is one souvenir you always look for when you travel?
  17. What is one of your favorite souvenirs you have ever gotten?
  18. Do you pack well in advance or at the last minute?
  19. How early do you like to arrive at the airport?
  20. If we had a vacation home somewhere, where would we want it to be?

20 Family Themed Date Night Conversation Starters

Let’s talk about family! Everyone’s family of origin is so different from who raised you, how you were raised, where you were raised, etc. Now, you and your spouse have joined together in your own family of creation. So, use these conversation starters to reminisce about the good, work through the bad, and dream about your family and the future of your family together!

  1. What is one thing you are grateful your parents taught you?
  2. What is one thing your family did growing up you want to do with our family?
  3. What is one thing you learned from your parents you do not want to pass down to our kids?
  4. Who is one person in your family that has passed away you wish you could share one more meal with?
  5. What is one thing you loved about your home as a child?
  6. What is one quality you possess you think would make you a great parent or does make you a great parent?
  7. Which of your family members do you act like most?
  8. What is one of your favorite general traditions your family does?
  9. What is one of your favorite holiday traditions your family does?
  10. Are there any traditions you want to create with our family that you did not do growing up?
  11. What are three things you love about our family?
  12. What did mealtimes look like in your family?
  13. Who was your “favorite” person in your family growing up?
  14. Which of your family members do you most look like?
  15. Who is one person you really admire in your family?
  16. What was your favorite trip you ever took with your family?
  17. Did your family have a pet(s) growing up, and if not, do you wish you had?
  18. How did/does your family handle conflict?
  19. What does your perfect family day look like?
  20. How did your parents talk about money/finances?

20 Fall Themed Date Night Conversation Starters

It’s finally fall! Football’s on TV. Leaves are falling. Halloween and Thanksgiving are approaching. And, we’re betting you’ve already indulged in your fair share of PSLs this season. Next time you and your spouse head out to check off one of these 25 fall date ideas, take these free fall themed conversation starters with you to talk through. Reminisce on fond memories, and debate your controversial candy corn opinions!  

  1. How did your family celebrate the fall season and/or Halloween when you were a kid? 
  2. What is one of your favorite things to do during fall? 
  3. What is your favorite fall recipe? 
  4. What is your opinion of candy corn? 
  5. What was your favorite Halloween costume you wore as a kid? 
  6. What is your favorite Halloween costume you have worn as an adult? 
  7. What is your favorite movie to watch during this time of year? 
  8. What is your favorite Halloween candy? 
  9. Do you prefer chocolate candy or fruity candy? 
  10. Do you prefer to carve pumpkins or paint pumpkins? 
  11. Do you like pumpkin flavored foods and drinks? 
  12. In your opinion, what is the worst Halloween candy? 
  13. Do you enjoy celebrating Halloween as an adult? 
  14. What is your favorite fall or Halloween decoration? 
  15. What did Thanksgiving dinner look like when you were a kid? 
  16. What is your favorite side item at Thanksgiving dinner? 
  17. Turkey or ham? Stuffing or dressing? Rolls or corn bread? Pumpkin or pecan pie? 
  18. Do you like to cook for Thanksgiving? 
  19. What is your favorite thing to do after eating Thanksgiving dinner? 
  20. In your opinion, is it acceptable to decorate for Christmas before Thanksgiving? 

20 General Date Night Conversation Starters V2 

These don’t have a theme…we’re dropping version two of our general conversation starters, ranging in topics and interests, so your conversation certainly won’t grow dull during your date. 

  1. If you could choose one exotic animal to have as a pet, what would it be?  
  2. If you could live anywhere in the world, and family and money were not factors, where would you choose? 
  3. What is the first charity you would donate to if you won the lottery? 
  4. If you had a time machine, would you travel forward to the future or backward to the past?  
  5. What is one thing you hope we accomplish in the next five years? 
  6. What is one date we have not done you would like to do?  
  7. If you could only eat at one fast food restaurant for the rest of your life, which would you choose?  
  8. What does your perfect morning look like? 
  9. If you could change one thing about your physical appearance, what would it be? 
  10. Who hogs the TV remote more—you or me? 
  11. Would you prefer to master a musical instrument or a foreign language? 
  12. What are you most excited about in our relationship during this season? 
  13. What is your favorite household chore? 
  14. What is your dream car?  
  15. If you could star in any movie, what would it be? 
  16. What would you do if you found money on the street? 
  17. What is your favorite way to exercise? 
  18. What strengths do I bring to our relationship? 
  19. What actor or actress would star in a movie about your life? 
  20. What is one way I can support you this week?

20 Date Night Conversation Starters That Will Make You Reminisce

Get ready to reminisce about “the good old days.” It’s fun to think back on fond memories you have from childhood and even from your early dating years with your spouse. Use these conversation starters to prompt laughs, storytelling, and fun, reminiscent conversation you likely haven’t engaged in in a while.

  1. What is one of your earliest memories?
  2. What is one of your favorite childhood memories?
  3. What was your favorite meal to eat as a child?
  4. As a child, what did you want to be when you “grew up?”
  5. What is a fond memory you have from your birthday as a child?
  6. What was your favorite subject in school?
  7. Who was your first girlfriend/boyfriend?
  8. Did you pass your driving test the first time you took it?
  9. Did you go to prom, and who was your date?
  10. What is one of your favorite high school memories?
  11. If you had the opportunity to relive high school, would you?
  12. What is one physical quality that initially attracted you to me?
  13. What was your favorite part of our first date?
  14. If we could redo our first kiss, would you want to?
  15. What is one of your favorite dates we have done?
  16. What is one piece of our proposal story you will never forget?
  17. What is one part of our wedding day you will never forget?
  18. What is one of your most embarrassing moments?
  19. What has been one of your favorite birthday celebrations as an adult?
  20. What is something we did before we were married that brings fond memories?

20 Deep Date Night Conversation Starters 

One way to grow your intellectual and emotional intimacy with your spouse is to have deep conversations, ask probing questions, and share viewpoints and feelings. We’ve put together a list of 20 deep conversation starters that are intended to spark thought-provoking discussions. On your next date, use these conversation starters to get to know your spouse in a more intimate way. 

  1. Do you want to be more like your parents or less like your parents?  
  2. What people have made you who you are today? 
  3. What experiences have made you who you are today? 
  4. What makes you anxious? 
  5. If you could relive a year in your life, what age would you choose? 
  6. In what ways have I changed since we first met? 
  7. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained one new ability, what would it be? 
  8. How do you want to be remembered after you die? 
  9. When was a time you felt really close to me? 
  10. What makes you feel nostalgic? 
  11. How have we succeeded in our marriage this week? 
  12. Are you satisfied with our physical intimacy? 
  13. What is one thing God has been teaching you? 
  14. What is one way I can pray for you this week? 
  15. What problem do you wish you could solve in the world? 
  16. How do you balance life and work? 
  17. If you could change your name, would you? 
  18. What is your favorite thing about being married?
  19. When did you first know you loved me? 
  20. Who is someone you admire? 

20 Thanksgiving Themed This or That Date Night Conversation Starters

Let the great Thanksgiving debate begin—it’s all fun and games until you must choose between creamed corn and macaroni and cheese…that’s plain mean. If you’re ready to engage in a friendly debate with your spouse ahead of Thanksgiving this year, talk through our 20 Thanksgiving themed this or that conversation starters! 

  1. Turkey or ham? 
  2. Stuffing or dressing? 
  3. Rolls or corn bread? 
  4. Pie or cobbler? 
  5. Mashed potatoes or potato salad?
  6. Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade or NFL Thanksgiving football? 
  7. White gravy or brown gravy? 
  8. Nap or play outside? 
  9. Guest or host? 
  10. Green beans or green bean casserole? 
  11. Cook or clean? 
  12. Pumpkin-spiced latte or apple cider? 
  13. Sweet tea or lemonade? 
  14. Black Friday in-store or Black Friday online? 
  15. Deviled eggs or cranberry sauce? 
  16. Broccoli cheese casserole or squash casserole? 
  17. Creamed corn or macaroni and cheese? 
  18. Brussels sprouts or sweet potato casserole? 
  19. Pumpkin pie or pecan pie? 
  20. Apple pie or chocolate pie? 

20 Christmas Themed This or That Date Night Conversation Starters 

If you liked the Thanksgiving edition of “this or that,” check out our Christmas edition below. Same rules apply—you must choose one! Use our 20 Christmas themed this or that conversation starters to spark fun conversations with your spouse. Will you be decorating Christmas cookies or a gingerbread house? If you break the rules and choose both, we won’t tell! 

  1. Christmas starts 11/1 or Christmas starts the day after Thanksgiving? 
  2. Christmas Eve or Christmas Day? 
  3. White lights or colored lights? 
  4. Angel or star? 
  5. Real Christmas tree or artificial Christmas tree? 
  6. Hot chocolate or eggnog? 
  7. Giving or receiving? 
  8. Wrapping paper or gift bags? 
  9. Red or green? 
  10. Chocolate chip cookies or sugar cookies? 
  11. “Elf” or “How the Grinch Stole Christmas” 
  12. Mistletoe or wreath? 
  13. Ornaments or ribbons? 
  14. Christmas socks or Christmas pajamas? 
  15. Red candy canes or green candy canes? 
  16. Attend a Christmas concert or go ice-skating? 
  17. Open presents early or open presents Christmas Day? 
  18. Decorate Christmas cookies or decorate a gingerbread house? 
  19. Cold weather or warm weather? 
  20. Nutcracker décor or snowman décor? 

20 Gratitude Date Night Conversation Starters 

It only seems natural to reflect on gratefulness, especially with the holidays approaching. As you share a meal with your family, big or small, consider using these 20 gratitude conversation starters. You and your spouse are a family—so use them among the two of you on a date night, or print them out to bring to your extended family’s holiday celebrations and share sweet moments of gratitude around the table.  

  1. What cheers you up when you are having a bad day? 
  2. What is one thing that made you smile today? 
  3. What is a fond memory you have from this year? 
  4. What is one way you show your gratitude? 
  5. What is an invention you are grateful for? 
  6. How has someone helped you recently?
  7. How have you helped someone recently? 
  8. What is a simple act of kindness you can easily implement into your daily life? 
  9. What is one thing you love about your job? 
  10. What is one of the best gifts you have ever received? 
  11. What is the best food item you ate today? 
  12. What song cheers you up as soon as you hear it? 
  13. Who makes you feel loved? 
  14. What is something you are looking forward to? 
  15. What makes you feel warm and cozy? 
  16. What is an accomplishment you are proud of? 
  17. What is your favorite thing you have learned recently? 
  18. What is a prayer God has answered recently? 
  19. What is your biggest prayer you are praying right now? 
  20. What do you think it means to be generous? 

Want To Slip Away for an Entire Weekend?

If you and your spouse want to spend uninterrupted time together more than just a typical date night, consider attending an upcoming WinShape Marriage Retreat.

Get Marriage Resources Sent to Your Inbox